More on Josh Hancock’s father
May 25th, 2007In my column for Baptist Press Sports, I developed my thoughts on the lawsuit Josh Hancock’s father, Dean Hancock, has filed against those who played no role in his son’s death.
We as a society have zero sense of personal responsibility, and a victim mentality has taken up permanent residence in the courtroom. There’s good reason for that, however – because it long ago took up permanent residence in our hearts. …
The blame-shifting and buck-passing of which we’re all capable began in the Garden of Eden, when Adam blamed his wife – and ultimately, God — for his sin. We’ve since become masters of the skill.
When we’re impatient with our kids, it’s because they aren’t behaving properly. When we cheat on our taxes, it’s because the government has already taken enough of our money. When we don’t work as hard as we should, it’s because our supervisors are too demanding. And on it goes.
UPDATE: It seems the BP site is down, and I don’t know how long it’s been that way or how long it will be that way. So, if you’d like to read my column, here it is in its entirety:
Like father, like son?
By Tim Ellsworth
JACKSON, Tenn. (BP)–Josh Hancock managed to dirty his reputation enough in the way he died – with a blood-alcohol content of nearly twice the legal limit.
But now Hancock’s father is doing even more harm to his dead son’s memory.
Dean Hancock, of Tupelo, Miss., is suing everybody even remotely involved in the accident that took his son’s life last month — Mike Shannon’s restaurant, the driver of the tow truck that Hancock slammed into and the driver of the stalled car that the tow truck had stopped to help.
According to a statement released by Hancock, the circumstances surrounding his son’s death “have caused great pain to all of Josh’s family.” He added that as administrator of his son’s estate, he was obligated to represent his family on all issues, “including any legal actions necessary against those who contributed to the untimely and unnecessary death.”
I’ll agree with Dean that his son’s death was certainly “untimely and unnecessary.” But the fault for that lies squarely with his son, and nobody else. I’m terribly sorry for this father’s loss, and I can’t even begin to understand the grief he and his family must feel. Nobody should have to endure that.
But the person responsible for Josh Hancock’s death was Josh Hancock. He’s the one who got plastered. He’s the one who foolishly got behind the wheel of a car. He’s the one who was speeding, talking on his cell phone and not wearing his seat belt.
Evidently irresponsibility runs in the family.
Dean Hancock’s friends would be wise to encourage him to withdraw this lawsuit. He certainly isn’t endearing himself to many people, and he’s only damaging his son’s reputation all the more. Likewise, the attorneys who are taking this action on Hancock’s behalf should be ashamed of themselves.
Since hearing the news about the lawsuit, I’ve read a lot of comments from people who point to this kind of stuff as evidence of what’s wrong with America. Most people are angry about it, as they should be. It’s a glaring case of injustice at work.
Hancock is simply trying to ruin the lives of many innocent people, and that’s horrible wrong. It ought to be criminally wrong, and I hope a judge has enough sense to throw this thing out of court. Of course, the damage will have already been done, as innocent people will have been forced to pay for the cost of defending themselves. It would only be fair for them to file a countersuit to reclaim from Hancock the money he is costing them.
We as a society have zero sense of personal responsibility, and a victim mentality has taken up permanent residence in the courtroom. There’s good reason for that, however – because it long ago took up permanent residence in our hearts.
It’s not an affliction that is unique to America. It’s an affliction that is part of the fabric of our fallen humanity.
Remember this conversation?
God: “Have you eaten of the tree of which I commanded you not to eat?”
Adam: “The woman whom you gave to be with me, she gave me the fruit of the tree, and I ate.”
The blame-shifting and buck-passing of which we’re all capable began in the Garden of Eden, when Adam blamed his wife – and ultimately, God — for his sin. We’ve since become masters of the skill.
When we’re impatient with our kids, it’s because they aren’t behaving properly. When we cheat on our taxes, it’s because the government has already taken enough of our money. When we don’t work as hard as we should, it’s because our supervisors are too demanding. And on it goes.
It is right to be outraged over what Dean Hancock is doing. He is trying to make innocent people pay for what his son alone is responsible for. That’s tragic, and unfair, and wrong – no matter how you look at it.
But it should force us to take a hard look at our own lives and recognize the sin present there because of what we ourselves have done. Only then, by accepting responsibility for our own actions, can we turn to God in repentance and enjoy the forgiveness He has provided through the Lord Jesus Christ. Only then, instead of blaming others for our shortcomings and relying upon our own merits, can we rest in His grace.
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I haven’t read your whole article yet, Tim, but I appreciate your perspective. I don’t expect to hear it on ESPN or any other national sports/news service. While there will be people calling Dean Hancock out, not many will identify themselves with the problem that lies at the root.
Excellent points, Tim.
I saw Josh’s little brother pitch for Ole Miss last year, his name is Jon-Jon. When I asked my friend, who is an avid Ole Miss fan, what happened to him this year he stated that he had a drinking and drug problem and they let him go. He also stated that he tried to transfer to Mississippi St. and they wouldn’t take him either. I don’t know if State’s not taking him had anything to do with his activities or not however.
One of your best columns that I have read Tim. Kudos.
what’s next? someone sues me because I planted the tree in my front yard that they ran into whilst drunk????
Tim,
I have addressed this same problem with our society. No longer are we EVER responsible for our own actions.
Thanks for your insight.
Well said, Tim. Thanks for writing this.
Tim, I think the man paid for his actions, the father is grieving and should be given his space. I wouldn’t depend on gossip to tell me anything about the brother and I think all those who contributed are probably having a hard time with their own actions. I think your article is judgemental, but that is my own thought and I take full responsibility for it. I don’t know how Dean Hancock or his attorney’s could look bad for suing. I just about agree with your last paragraph about looking at our own failings and maybe then casting the first stone but it looks like you already cast yours. We all know we are sinners, born into sin thanks to Adam and Eve but I also know Jesus died for my sin, took it upon himself and all I need do is hold my tongue or in this case keyboard and leave such matters to him, besides you nor anyone else here matters in the case and your judgement means nothing. I’m sure the father and other family members are wondering right now where all the Christians went and where was God, YOUR challenge should be to encourage and strengthen this man and his family at this time. Everybody has a good time until some one gets an eye put out.
I realize that the father is grieving, Brenda, but that still doesn’t give him the right to try to harm those who are innocent, which is what he’s doing.
You’ve had your say about the responsibility of the bar, so we’re not going to cover that again. But suing the guy who owns the broken-down car that the tow truck stopped to help? Give me a break. I can’t believe that you would support something so outrageous.
…the father is grieving and should be given his space.
I am curious… when do we allow for grief to affect other’s livelyhoods while we sit idly by and watch lives get ruined because of one man’s grief? Inflicting punishment on these men will not reverse the events that ook place.
I do not mean that in any harsh sense so please don’t read that into my statement.
If in grief, a man inflicts undue punishment onto others (I really believe it to be unjust), is it okay to let he man do that? Or should a close friend/relative/confidant pull him aside and help him to think in his time of grief? What is more loving?
People grieve and hurt, but they should grieve and hurt well- to the glory of God. They should suffer, but do it well, unto the glory of God. It is not a time of finger-pointing. No matter how much he sues or how much he wins, his son will never come back. If he wants to be effective in helping other parents to steer clear of his fate, why not help educate parents on how to talk with their children about alcohol? Why not let his shortcomings shine through in hopes that others will see his mistakes and the results thereof and actively seek to prevent their children from following in the same footsteps his children did/are?
So, what do we do with those who are grieving? Do we let them grieve the best they see fit or do we guide them when they are not up to par with thinking straight?
It would appear as if this type of grief- revenge seeking grief, brings about the roots of bitterness, which in turn leads to a life enslaved to sin.
j razz
well said, j razz…..well said….
I assume you all know that a judge will decide if the suit will be allowed. They will each file papers at the courthouse giving their side, the judge will read it, they will have their say at a short hearing and then it will be decided. It might cost something but bars employ attorney’s for this reason and I’m sure everyone has an insurance company that will defend them. Their rates may eventually go up but out of pocket cost are probably nothing. And j razz, holding him up while gently reminding him who the Father is and that is who he should lean on is the right way and I’m glad you pointed that out. Coming out swinging and calling his children drunks, failures and anything else will only cause more pain and agony it’s the gentle part that shows grace and someone close to him or a members of his church (if he is a church goer) are the one to do that “pointing out”. Everyone grieves differently, frankly, I’m surprised he found an attorney to take the case but I don’t know the state law in whatever state he is bringing suit. They are fishing.
So Brenda, if I cut off my foot with my lawnmower, would it be OK for me to go and bust up my neighbor’s car with a baseball bat, since they probably have insurance?
That’s the logic you’re employing here.
You can go ahead and have the last word — because I don’t have anything else to say, and because you’re doing a pretty good job of making my case for me.
To me the issue isn’t whether a judge will allow the lawsuits or not. It involves the underlying change in our societal climate that allows for and even encourages suing in the first place, effectively deflecting responsibility in many cases.
The other day, while driving and chatting with my son, another driver dangerously cut us off. I shook my head and made some comment about us nearly being in an accident. Without pause, my son replied, “that’s okay mom, it would have been his fault anyways and you could have sued his pants off.” I stopped, took a breath and wondered why such a thought literally occupied first place in his mind. Our family neither believes nor teaches that philosophy. Yet here it was - in full view.
Grief can perhaps provide context for understanding Mr. Hancock’s reactions. It does not, however, justify them. When Jesus called the Pharisee’s out with, “Let he who is without sin…..” he finished with a clear command to the adulteress - “Go and sin no more.” We much prefer focusing on the first part - the part that points the attention toward someone else. We shy away from the straightforward commission given by Christ to the woman – the part that speaks directly to us, to our own responsibility.
We prefer mercy far more than justice - yet Christ holds each in perfect tension. Mercy AND justice. Peace AND righteousness. Forgiveness AND judgment. We are called to be like Christ - all of Christ, not the just the ‘touchy-feely’ bits that keep us on everyone’s good side.
Businesses are required to insure themselves, they get sued all the time, it’s life and if you think you won’t need it, why do you insure your car? I’ll bet it is because of the law. Just because something happens doesn’t mean you will end up with big bucks either. You may not be allowed to sue or prove your case. I don’t need the last word, just giving my opinion like everyone else. I wouldn’t take a baseball bat to the neighbor’s car if I were you, then you would go to jail and be sued, better have that homeowners insurance up to date.
The bottom line is this: Hancock’s son made a terrible, fatal mistake. Hancock is trying to take it out on innocent people, while also attaching monetary value to the corpse of his son.
Judges may decide the suit, but it should never even get to court. Based on what has been reported as the facts this whole endeavor is ridiculous and Hancock is basically hocking gobs of spit on his son’s grave.
He should be thanking God that his son–who was in another car accident just days earlier–didn’t hurt anyone but himself. Instead, Hancock is trying to take care of that it seems, through litigation. How twisted.
At this time, he would rather use his son’s death to place blame and make money. Instead he could be going around the country speaking about the tragedies of drunk driving.